Bullying can’t affect you, if you don’t give them the power. It may seem like bullies dominate and try to control you, but the truth is, they need your cooperation. If you don’t respond to a bully in a way he/she expects, in effect, you are making it difficult for them to bully you. It’s like playing tennis without a partner – it’s not going to work! The only way to be bullied is to respond accordingly – to “hit that tennis ball back” to the bully.
The bullying solution is to develop self confidence. Bullies tend to pick on people who have low self esteem, lack confidence, are shy, introverted, scared to speak out etc. They pick these targets because they know they can dominate them. But, if you simply don’t possess any of these qualities, they can’t harm you.
It’s about self confidence
Change your own response – leave the bully playing on their own. However, it’s easier said than done. The only way to really free and empower yourself is to change the original data inside yourself that cause the feelings of no control, low self confidence, low self esteem etc. in response to the bully’s behavior.
The key to remember is, once YOU change the controls inside of you through subconscious programming, the dynamics of the bully-victim relationship will change automatically. It may seem unfair, and you may be thinking, why should I change? Shouldn’t it be the bully who should change? The fact of the matter is that no matter how bad the bully is; no matter how wrong they are; no matter what action you take, you cannot change the other person without their cooperation.
You may be able to get them to understand how their behavior is hurting you, and you may be able to get them to change their behavior, but there is no way you can make them change against their will.
The only person you have full, complete control over is yourself.
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Let’s take an example:
Tom has a boss who treats him with disrespect by ignoring him, telling him to do things without saying “please”. He criticizes Tom at every turn, and even uses bad language; this causes Tom to feel hurt, inferior, disrespected, and traumatized.
However, if Tom had a bullying solution – a way of feeling good regardless of what his boss was saying or doing, Tom’s boss would have no power over him.
If Tom knew how to change the original records that caused those bad feelings, Tom would then have the choice – to continue to suffer at the hands of his boss (the bully); or to change those original records, and end his own suffering. Tom’s boss may or may not change – but it won’t matter because Tom will be able to feel good regardless of what his boss is doing or saying.
Here are 4 ways develop self confidence
1. Use the Eutaptics tapping technique to get rid of the victim mentality. Stop giving your power to other people, circumstances and things. Instead, take back the power. You’re your own boss. So think about something how you feel when someone bullies you. For example’s sake, you can use this bullying solution – let’s assume you feel inferior.
Think back to where you’ve felt the same feeling of inferiority in the past. Notice the feeling, and notice the details of the memory. Notice what the feeling feels like, where you feel it in your body, and how strong it is. Now use the Euptaptics tapping technique to clear and flip the memory into a more positive one. Keep going until you’ve flipped all the memories, thoughts and feelings that are associated with inferiority and develop self confidence.
2. Stop trying to be a people-pleaser. If you find yourself constantly trying to live up to other people’s expectations, then it’s time to stop. Use the Eutaptics tapping technique to clear out any feelings, whenever you feel the urge to go out of your way to help someone, or do something you really don’t want to do. The only person you really have to please is yourself.
Stop worrying if the other person might stop liking you, talking to you, start judging you, hating you etc. Use the Eutaptics memory reimprinting process to flip any memories that support this kind of destructive behavior. Helping people is noble, but not at the cost of your peace and sanity.
3. Let go of fear of the future. Life is full of ups and downs. Don’t sabotage your current success by constantly thinking about what can go wrong, what if something doesn’t work out, what if your marriage falls apart, what if your kids go off track etc. These negative thoughts are just a habit and one that you can break using Eutaptics tapping.
It is these kind of self limiting thoughts that lead to a low self esteem and make you more vulnerable to being bullied. Tap on these feelings and thoughts, clear them and flip them into positive, self empowering feelings that develop self confidence. No matter what happens, know you have the tools to face whatever challenges life throws at you with Eutaptics.
4. Be kinder to yourself. You’re so good at being mean to yourself. Observe your inner thoughts and self talk. We have these movies in our minds, and we keep replaying them. Usually they are negative montages of everything that is wrong in our lives. You keep beating up on yourself for not looking as good as your co-worker, not being pretty enough, thin enough, rich enough, handsome enough, successful enough etc.
How you interact with those around you, especially your loved ones, is a reflection of how you feel about yourself. How you treat them is also impacting and training them to become like you. Your emotions and your feelings are the key – once you clear those up, everything changes!
How Eutaptics can help
So if someone is bullying you, you can do two things – you can either blame them, or, own up to the fact that you’re really doing it to yourself. We try to project our problems onto other people, saying so and so hurt me for this reason.
But the reality is, we are reacting a certain way to what is happening. This common denominator will always stay the same, no matter where you work, with whom, where you live, who your parents are etc. you will keep feeling the same basic feelings, unless you use Eutaptics tapping to clear them and flip them.
If someone is hurting you through bullying, remember, you are the one with the power to change how you react to the situation. If you no longer react the same way, the bullying will automatically stop. Or it will just not bother you anymore.
Boost your self worth by using the various Eutaptics techniques provided on this website to heal, develop self confidence and change yourself. Keep tapping!
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