You may have been warned in the past about “toxic” people. In fact, there are social media memes that give you the “warning signs” of such people – what to look out for, and how to avoid them. The truth is, as real as the effects of “toxic people” feel to those they affect, they are only toxic to certain people. Others seem to be completely “immune” to them.
And whether or not you’re one of those people who is affected depends on what you’re holding in your subconscious. The great news is, even if you are holding the right data that allows you to be negatively affected by these people right now, that data can be changed.
This means, you no longer need to look out for the warning signs, and you no longer need to go out of your way to avoid these “toxic” people – they simply won’t affect you any longer.
How do Toxic People Affect Others?
A few of the warning signs shared on social media regarding toxic people include the following:
* You feel a strong desire for the person to like you, even though you feel uncomfortable around them. Something about this person draws you in and compels you to gain their attention and approval.
* The toxic person will pay an uncommon amount of attention to you, until you “fall” for them, and then will ignore you completely, causing you emotional pain. The harder you try to please them, the more distant and aloof they become with you.
* They deliberately withhold attention from you, making you feel needy and desperate. In fact, they will usually pay extra attention to others around you while ignoring you deliberately.
* Once you’re hooked, you are always the one to initiate contact while they play it cool. Whereas they seemed to make such an effort in the beginning of your encounter with them, now that you are in their “net” they drop all efforts and leave you to do all the work.
* They lead you on, making you believe that you are special, only to let you down later. This causes additional emotional pain because you have much further to fall since they’ve built you up so high.
* They make a point of making promises they know they won’t keep.
* They manipulate you through emotional blackmail and guilt.
* They use lies and excuses as a part of everyday communication. They’re particularly prone to using excuses and lies when there is no need to use them. This causes further hurt and emotional pain, in addition to confusion.
* They don’t react the way you expect them to – or the way most people you know would react. For example, they behave as if hurtful comments and events are no big deal. This makes you begin to question your own judgement, along with your emotional and mental health. This person seems so confident and sure of themselves that you tend to put more faith in their view than in your own.
* They make you feel inferior by belittling your attempts to express yourself; or tease you in a way that clearly has more beneath the surface than humor.
* They take every opportunity to point out your flaws and errors in grammar, the way you speak, your views, and anything else that comes up.
* They employ bullying tactics on social media as well as in person, in order to keep you feeling insecure and unsafe.
* No-one else seems to see through their facade, and your friends can’t understand what your problem is.
* They provoke you intentionally; and when you react, they criticize you for being hypersensitive and overemotional.
* They are incapable of empathy or understanding how their actions are hurting you. They come across as cold and unfeeling.
* They accuse you of things they are doing themselves; and when you point this out, they always have a convoluted explanation, or accuse you of being unreasonable.
* They play on your insecurities in order to build a false sense of security in you – to be used to control you down the line.
* You find yourself apologizing about things that were not your fault, just to keep the peace, and to avoid their disapproval or rejection.
* They make you feel like you’re the crazy one. You end up feeling distraught, devastated, empty and worthless; going to any lengths to try to make sense of their behavior and work your way back into their favor.
Does any of this sound familiar to you? If you recognize these traits in someone you know, and you are suffering emotionally because of their toxic personality, it’s time to take control and end the cycle. The truth is, you have the power to end your suffering – if you choose to do so.
Once you have read the information in this article, you will either choose to set yourself free by doing what it takes to make the changes necessary; or you will choose to continue suffering. Either way, once you have this information it is your choice, and you have the power to take the action that will free you – or to allow yourself to remain under the control of someone outside of yourself.
It’s not about what the toxic person does, it’s about what you are carrying in your subconscious, that makes the difference in whether you are affected or not.
How to Free Yourself from a “Toxic” Person – Permanently
The first step in setting yourself free from a controlling personality – no matter who they are, or what they do – is to recognize and accept that you are the only person who truly has control over how you feel. No-one outside of you (including a toxic person) can make you feel anything unless you cooperate.
The emotions you feel are produced by your own body – they are the sensations of chemicals produced by your brain and other organs, based on your perception. Change your perception, and your feelings change. This may sound unreasonable and far-fetched at first, but if you really want to be free from toxic people, suspend your disbelief just for a moment, and consider the possibility.
What if You Had All the Control
Take a moment to imagine what it would be like if you were able to be in complete control over how you feel. Imagine how it would feel to know that no-one – regardless of how clever, manipulative, or toxic they are – can make you feel anything you choose not to feel. Imagine the freedom.
If you like the idea of that freedom, why not try this option out, and find out if it’s true? Here’s a more detailed explanation of how you can change your reality (including your experience with other people) by changing the inside of you: How to Change Your Reality
The second step is to use the FasterEFT technique to clear out the programming in your subconscious that is causing you to be enslaved by this person’s toxic personality. Start by thinking about what bothers you most about this person. Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and notice how you feel. Then, think back to see if you can remember feeling this same feeling before. Go to your earliest memory of experiencing this feeling. Now, use the FasterEFT Technique to flip that memory.
Make sure you keep repeating the process until you have completely flipped the memory. Then, go back to thinking about the toxic person in your life at the moment, and notice how you feel now. Again, go back to see if you can remember feeling that same feeling in the past, and use FasterEFT to address that memory. Repeat this process with each memory that relates to the feelings you have about the toxic person.
Finally, once you have addressed all of those memories you can recall that feature the same feelings you have about this toxic person at the moment; go back and think about that person again to see what’s still left. Now, use the technique to address all of the bad emotions and memories related to this toxic person, that still remain.
Again, make sure that you don’t stop until all of the bad feelings and memories have flipped. From now on, whenever you encounter a toxic person, use the technique in the moment, to maintain control of your own feelings. You can use Mental Tapping in the moment if you are unable to tap physically at the time.
But it’s Such a Lot of Work!
It’s not a magic spell, and it won’t work unless you actually do it. It may be a lot to go through – depending on how many experiences you have had in your past that are providing the structure for this issue – but isn’t it worth it, if it empowers you to free yourself from the clutches of toxic people forever?
Even if it takes you a long time to get through all of the memories and emotions you’re carrying in your subconscious, it will mean you can then spend the rest of your life completely in control of what you experience – no more living at the mercy of crazy people or rude people, or cruel people – or toxic people.
You have the power inside you, and you now have the tool. From now on it is entirely up to you whether you choose to free yourself, or choose to continue to keep yourself prisoner by holding onto your own shackles.
Robert G. Smith explains how to clear your life of toxic relationships effectively and permanently:
To find out more about how the subconscious programming is created, that has been keeping you trapped up until now, read: The REAL Cause of All Your Problems.
To find out how to use the FasterEFT Technique effectively, read: The FasterEFT Technique – Step-by-Step
To watch videos on FasterEFT and hear about the transformations others have achieved using this technique, visit: The FasterEFT YouTube Channel.