We’ve talked about relationships with our mothers and fathers over the past month, but today we’re going to look at family relationships on a broader level.
Yes, your mother and father (whether they were around or not) played a huge role in making you who you are. But they aren’t the only ones, right? Our siblings, our cousins, our aunts, uncles, grandparents — they all made an impact as well.
From our first breath, we start learning how to interact with other people based on how our family interacts with each other. That’s why some kids are so used to dealing with conflict, or raised voices, or even violence, while others aren’t.
But the tricky thing is that siblings from the same family can end up with very different ideas of relationships. The older sibling that bullied or harassed their younger sibling likely interacts with people in an entirely different way than that younger sibling.
For example, Donald grew up with a brother who bullied him. There was a particular memory that he had about a nickname his brother gave him: Dino. It was the name of the dog-like dinosaur in a popular kid’s show, and Donald hated it. He was terrified that his brother would tell his schoolmates the name, because he couldn’t escape it at home — school was the one place he could be Donald.
That fear of not feeling like he could stand up to his brother, that fear that he couldn’t connect with others because he couldn’t reveal this nickname, that fear that he wasn’t good enough, that fear that he was unsafe, followed Donald for decades.
His brother set up an emotional environment for Donald that made their home feel unsafe. It made Donald feel unsafe everywhere. And that unsafe feeling never left Donald — until the memories were re-imprinted with eutaptics®.
When he tapped on those memories, he was able to let it go. He forgave his brother. Not only that, he was able to rewrite those memories and change how he feels about his brother.
Donald’s story isn’t unique. If you have a sibling, you’ve probably experienced something similar. Maybe not to that level, but you’ve experienced the turbulent sibling relationship. Maybe you were on the other side and were the bully! That can come with deep shame and regret, and impact friendships, relationships with colleagues, and romantic relationships as well.
And there’s no outrunning it. Kim moved to Australia from Arkansas to get away from her family, but that didn’t solve her problems. The same issues followed her there. Some people even go as far to change their name when they leave — they think the maybe the name or location is the problem.
It doesn’t matter how far you run, or how much you try to change the outside, you’ll keep repeating the same patterns until you deal with the real problems inside.
That’s why I created my latest course, My Family Messed Me Up. In this course, you’ll learn and experience:
1. How to find the root cause of your current problems in your relationships
2. The real secret to changing everything about your life
3. How to create healthy fulfilling relationships
4. Changes and shifts in your own relationships when tapping-a-long to the session videos
This course helps you explore all your family relationships, and ultimately increase your self-esteem and personal value, decrease your stress levels and health issues, and create a ripple effect in all your relationships.