Very long story put short: I dated someone for 4 months. We got separated because we were in a foster home. Two years later we reunite after searching for each other the entire 2 years we weren't together. We dated for a few weeks and I decided I didn't like how things were going so I tell them I don't want to be with them. They text me back saying they were going to cut them self and were crying and the whole bit. So I said we'll try to work things out (I felt so bad they were crying and stuff). A week later they tell me they want to break up. That was back in December now it's March. Today I've been sad and I've been crying because I still have deep feelings for this person and I miss them. I sent them a message on a social networking site and they just didn't even respond. My heart is absolutely broken.
Can someone please tell me what to say when I tap? I don't know what to say. I really need relief from this. I can't stop crying.
You are processing a loss here. Always remember “how do you know”. Sitting there, in front of the computer, how do you know that you are not over this relationship. What are you feeling, how are you making it real to yourself.
Just focus on one memory, one emotion, and watch a video and tap along until it's gone.
Whenever the emotions are too intense, just tap on how you know. As you reduce the intensity of the emotion, you can focus on things to say. Saying “It's safe to let this go” Is a good standard phrase to use when releasing very intense stuff. Then you can move on to looking at the different aspects of the loss like your perspective, his perspective, past relationships where the same thing may have occured.
Realize that at the time in your life that you met him, he was just the right person for you. As you have grown in emotional intelligence, things have changed. That's likely why you tried to break up with him.
Every trauma is a gift when you can let go of the emotions, and keep the wisdom. Good luck on this bumpy road!