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December 11, 2014 at 8:09 pm #25405
Hello everyone, I have a host of complexes, anger issues anxieties and have felt the whole spectrum of bad emotions.
I have been on my healing journey for the past few months after searching my whole life for the WHY. I now know why things had to be the way they are and I’m okay with everything that has happened to me and in fact I’m proud of myself for the strength and will I gave myself with the help God and the talents and gifts I was given to be able to stand the nightmare which is my reality.
I was sexually abused by my mother at a young age and further neglected and physically abused by my father. With all start, I moved to the USA at age 9 which was a traumatic experience within itself now being alone to grow up in foreign land, I was already problematic kid and whatever childhood I had was gone. I have so many issues, but the one that I cannot get a hold on is my sexuality. Sexually I didn’t develop normally and didn’t quiet understand my sexuality, I had created a sort of sexual inferiority complex and could only perform in a situation that we both emotionally cared for each other. I slowly realized I would get aroused from things that brought me shame and I hid it…I wasn’t getting the sexual satisfaction in my loving relations but understood I needed the emotional bond and basically in my mind my 3rd dimension conscious I know what’s good for me and what I want and what attracts me, but that is different then how I developly “wired”. Few years later my sister, my only true care giver passed away, I didn’t even understand the effect that had on me and the added trauma that brought me. Thanks to ex-girlfriend whom in another universe we would be together, she slapped me abit, woke me up to how I changed and lost control of everything including whatever sexuality I had was gone. But then I began my journey to find myself and I did and I got to a point that I can heal and good with just having a scar and begin living a fulfilled happy life. I found eft 10 days ago then found faster eft 7 days ago and have watched Robert’s videos and begun tapping a lot and whenever I get a rush of nerves and anxiety I tap and tap on my sexuality some more. Now I am looking for a little guidance, how do I go about changing what sexually excites me to what attracts me and makes me feel good and unashamed. That is really on the top of the pyramid in terms of what’s holding me back, I am good with the abused and neglected part. Thank you for reading, thank you Robert for creating this community and helping many people and peace to all!
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